So I know I haven't done anything on the site in weeks, but I've been busy preparing for/starting college. And now I'm gonna put up the biggest lesson I've learned in a long time, and it has nothing to do with science.

     If you keep up with the blog, you may have noticed that there's a really special guy in my life and that things aren't that easy keeping him there. Circumstances and all. But he was still really special. He is still really special.
     He just can't be the same kind of special anymore.
     I've been feeling really unsure about our closeness for months now, like I should let it go, but I felt like there wasn't a justifiable reason. I really liked him, he loved me, he's an amazing person and it was an amazing relationship.
     But the feeling wouldn't go away.
     So I've been praying, 'God, if you want me to let it go, I want to be sure. I don't want to let the best guy in the world go based on a gut feeling that may have no standing power at all. Show me.'
     Well, for a while, things kept going. There was no indication other than that feeling that I needed to let go, and if you've ever had a guy like this you would no that letting go is impossible unless you are absolutely certain it's the right thing, and even then it's hard.
     One of my roommates is a junior in college. She heard about me and the guy and said that she had been in a similar position the prior year, and eventually had to let go because she knew it was best for both of them. Hint number one, but I still wasn't sure. I told God, 'If a man behind a pulpit tells me I may need to let go of a person, even if there's nothing wrong with us, I'll take it as a Your will.'
     A couple days later in chapel, our speaker was talking about how we should appease our conscience, whether it was over a moral issue, or a person or thing we needed to let go of even if they weren't immoral.
     Crazy how God answers prayer so promptly and specifically, huh?
     So I did it. I told him why, and I know he's hurt but he was very mature and understanding because he is incredible. One question, however, remained: why?
     Why did I have to let him go? If we weren't doing anything wrong, and he loved God, and I loved God, and we were both benefiting spiritually from the relationship, then why? WHY?!?
     I'm doing a study on James where you write out the chapter of the Bible that you're reading. I was reading the second half of James 2 and I read this:
"Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up his son Isaac upon the altar?  You see that faith was active along with his works, and faith was completed by his works" (ESV).
So there it is. Sometimes God makes us do hard things, give up wonderful things, wonderful people, not because they're wrong, but to complete our faith.  God is using this break up to prove my faith in Him, my willingness to obey.
So even though I get the moral of the story... it's still hard. And I still need prayer. But he probably needs it more. Please pray that he'll be alright and seek God always and through everything and live for Him. And that God's will would be done, on earth as it is in Heaven.