So in James 2, the Bible says that even if we live perfect lives, if we mess up once, we've basically trashed the whole law and we're guilty of all of.  In the sermon on the mount, Jesus says that to hate someone is the same as to murder them, and to lust after a woman is the same as to have slept with her.  And a lot of people stumble with this, because surely murder is worse than anger! ... right? Well, isn't it??
Well I finally worked it out in my head last night. The statement I am about to make is not Gospel truth.  It is my interpretation and something to think on, so take the words of one saved by grace with a grain of salt.
You are not as bad as a serial killer because you stole a candy bar from the supermarket when you were seven.  You are as damned as a serial killer because you stole a candy bar from the supermarket when you were seven.  You are as bad as a serial killer because, given the right conditions, you would be a serial killer.  Sin is not what you do; sin is what you are without Christ.
That some find salvation is the the perfect life, unjust crucifixion, and resurrection of Jesus Christ, while others do not, is not unfair to those who were not saved; it is mercy on those who were.  It is mercy that any of us are saved, because each of us is a potential serial killer/rapist/murderer/liar/petty thief.  That God loves any of us at all is mind-blowing- that God loves all of us is unspeakably beautiful- that so many of us refuse Him is heartbreaking, especially to Him, the perfect lover of every imperfect soul.